The song is from Daron’s POV, about his and Ziggy’s epic fall offstage in New York and some of the aftermath. I’m further along in the story now (…still working my way to being all caught up!…) but the whole Daron finally realizing he was in love with Ziggy again and then not even getting to say remotely anything about it to him before Ziggy was just totally gone, after having done something extreme and terrifying to boot, really struck me when I first read it, and it’s stuck with me as I’ve read on. (And then, of course, when Ziggy is gone AGAIN, after Daron’s been building up to it so much. Just, in both situations, the amounts of UNFAIR and BUT and NO, BUT REALLY? were so agonizing.) And it stuck with me enough that I was able to think of a few lines for a song, and then it just went from there.

I’m playing a dulcimer in the song, which is the only stringed instrument I can play (and by play I mean do basic strumming of chords as long as they’re not F because for some reason dulcimers don’t do F, just F#, at least in the tuning I have it in). I’m actually a drummer :-), but took some dulcimer lessons one summer for fun, and still like playing around with it sometimes.

My heart is open
I’m waiting for you
And I can only fear the good or bad that it may do
But my heart is open
I’m waiting for you

You’ve shipped off to quarantine
And I feel detained
And though sometimes I get reasons to smile
It’s just not the same as when you’re around
As when you’re around me, skin close, voice in my ear
Breathing my name
Even in dreams it’s not the same

My heart is open
I’m waiting for you
And I can only fear the good or bad that it may do
But my heart is open
I’m waiting for you

I don’t think you could ever know with how much distance I’ve had to cope
for months my thoughts have raced for miles and then there’s the ones I actually drove just to find you gone again, out of my reach, and still no chance to speak
just left with new wreckage to sort through inside of me
And I know you’re off to reconcile ruins of your own
I just wish that you could do that and still be close to home
Or at least use a damn phone

My heart is open
I’m waiting for you
And I can only fear the good or bad that it may do
But my heart is open
I’m waiting for you
Last time I had my arms around you
We were crashing to the ground
I’ve replayed it a thousand times and I’m still trying to figure out how
I might’ve pulled you back from your mind’s edge
Could I have even helped you at all?
Maybe it was chaos bigger than the both of us, and the most I ever could’ve done was hold on

My heart is open
I’m waiting for you
And I can only fear the good or bad that it may do
But my heart is open
I’m waiting for you