Tag Archives: tennessee

Operation Spirit

Here’s one of the things about depression. I don’t–unlike some people we know–get suicidal thoughts. Not according to my therapist, anyway. What I do get are one step over from that, which is big picture thoughts like… what is the meaning of life anyway?

Anybody Listening

We sat on the rock looking at the water for a longish time. The sun got hot to the point I took my jacket off. Like, summer hot. Ziggy stripped his T-shirt off and sunned himself, using his balled up jacket and shirt as a pillow.

Tired Wings

In retrospect, I should have said no to the celebratory free glass of champagne that the steakhouse offered me. I was too surprised by it to refuse. I guess that’s how you know it was a “classy” place.

The Cure: High

You know what else was kind of terrifying? I don’t know if it was Flip or marijuana that brought it out, but Claire had a charming side I had never seen before. As usual with me when I smoked, I got quiet. (I mean quieter than usual.) But Claire came to life.

A Million Miles Away

(Saturday post! Enjoy, and thank you for the contributions to the Tip Jar! -ctan) — I sometimes wonder how much research goes into what phones sound like. Remember back when phone equipment was all made by Ma Bell? Phones used to be something you had to get installed by the phone company. They were expensive […]

Mama, I’m Coming Home

Life doesn’t often give you a situation that is a clear fork in the road. This or that. Left or right. As Ziggy would say, no false dichotomies, please. But I really did appear to have two paths I could take if I didn’t want to drive myself slowly insane, alone in my hotel room.

I Need You

Sarah called me, drunk, after Jordan’s memorial, from somewhere quite loud. A night club, probably. “Why aren’t you here?” she shouted/cried.

What Are We Going To Do

Time both slows down and speeds up when you’re not doing a lot. When every day is the same, they seem to take forever, and yet because they leave little impression, thinking back on it you can’t tell how much time has gone by. Which is another way to say I don’t know how long […]

Through An Open Window

(As promised, I’ve taken inventory of the T-shirts remaining, by the way. See the swag post. Every order before December 1st will get a bonus red DGC notebook! -ctan) — The night clerk’s name was Ricky, by the way, and he was still in high school, but he only did a half day and then […]

Other Voices

I want you to understand what I was going through, but I didn’t understand it myself, and I still don’t. So I’ll just tell you what was happening and maybe you can figure it out. I don’t mean what was happening logistically: what had happened in that realm was I had become the person Claire […]